Thursday, March 03, 2011

DAUGHTERS AND FATHERS

The letter from Girl in Need in Baltimore (December 24) who needed more time from her father is a cry for more attention from her father who is afraid to spend too much time with her. I was a member of a Divorced and Separated Catholics group for about 12 years. Most of that time I was the only male in the group and I had the chance to listen to the women’s reasons why their marriage failed. What most of the women did not realize is that nearly all men have much stronger sexual urges than they do. The strong sexual urge in the wrong situation can be extremely frightening to the man.
I once had the opportunity to talk to a lady who was having problems in her marriage. Her husband was angry because the woman was continually picking fights with him. In the course of our conversation, the lady told me that when she was young, she and her father would have boxing matches!! The boxing matches were the father’s way of “sexually safely” interacting with his daughter. The young lady learned that love and attention from her father and later from her husband required something similar to a boxing match. Her husband, of course, had no idea why his wife was continually picking fights with him. The fights were her way of gaining attention from her husband.
When a girl is very small (less than 10 years old perhaps) she and her father often are “pals” and spend a lot of time together. Sports activities are just one of the things that bring father and daughter together. Both the father and the daughter are happy with the arrangement. However, when the daughter begins to reach puberty and starts to become a woman, the father’s attention to his daughter becomes much less. It becomes much less because the father is terrified of his own feelings. Any man sees almost any woman as a beautiful person and is attracted to her. This attraction is normal and is what makes the human race grow in numbers. Such attraction between a father and his daughter is socially forbidden and rightly so. The father is terrified of his own feelings and begins to distance himself from his daughter. The daughter, of course, has absolutely no idea why her father is not as close as he once was. The daughter then somehow blames herself and her self-confidence as a woman decreases. Of course, blaming her father is not a good option because the daughter loves her father and does not want to believe that he has changed. I suspect that the lack of self-confidence that so many women have is due to the change in their father’s ability to “safely” be close to her. Eventually, the daughter finds her own man to pay more attention to her and a marriage is the result.
The same dynamic occurs in Australian aborigines. The struggle for food in the desert “outback” of Australia is so intense that only very small bands of aborigines can exist in any one place. The population-size must be kept low enough so that food for all can be found. A tribe has several distance-separated clans. Because of the small number of people in the outback desert, there is a danger of genetic reproductive errors that can produce mentally and physically damaged children. With absolutely no knowledge of genetics, the aborigines have developed a system to solve the population genetics problem. A marriage is allowed in aborigine society only between a man and a woman from different tribes. This separation minimizes the danger of genetic errors. Also, the man marries a much younger woman so that the peak reproductive years of the man and his wife are “out of sync” and result in fewer children and a smaller population. However, this system means that the newly married man and his mother-in-law are about the same age. The problem of a possible attraction of the man for his mother-in-law is avoided by the policy that any needed interaction between mother-in-law and son-in-law must be carried out without the son-in-law seeing his mother-in-law. Any necessary conversation is carried out with the son-in-law and mother-in-law speaking when they are back-to-back and do not see each other.
The father of the “Girl in Need From Baltimore” is terrified of his own feelings and is doing what the aborigines of Australia do and has removed himself from too much close contact with his daughter.

OLDERWISER

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN CULTURAL AND ETHNIC DIVERSITY

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN ETHNIC AND CULTURAL DIVERSITY


The United States is a product of the melting pot that takes immigrants and allows them to retain their ethnic customs and, at the same time, gives them the opportunity to be assimilated into the American Culture. I have enjoyed the wild polka dancing at a Polish Wedding, the handkerchief dance at a Jewish wedding, and the bashing of the Piñata at Mexican Christmas parties. The Irish Parade and green beer on St. Patrick’s Day, Hungarian sausages made for the holidays, the Hawaiian Hula dance and music, the music at Preservation Hall and funeral parades in New Orleans, are all ethnic customs that make the crazy quilt of American customs such a joy to experience. The variety seems endless and we are a better country for the chance to sample all the ethnic variety of our citizens. However, the ethnic variety must not be confused with cultural variety. The multitude of immigrants who bring their ethnic customs to our society, when called upon to defend the United States, even with their lives, join with their neighbors to solve a common problem or make decisions about their government are able to set aside the ethnic differences and become supporters of the American Culture that has united us all in the common goal of making the United States the best place in the world to enjoy the fruits of liberty and freedom. Nowhere else in the world does this ability exist. We must not confuse ethnic diversity with cultural diversity. They are not the same. This is not to say that American Culture is completely homogenous, it is not. The unique difference that seems not to exist in other countries, is that American citizens know the difference between ethnic and culture. The important concepts that make us a nation are common to us all. The common knowledge and acceptance of these concepts is not an accident. Schools were part of the engine that formed us into the American Culture.
The cry for diversity that we hear so often from the liberal ( i.e. socialist ) media is aimed at changing and destroying the American Culture that has made us the best country on earth.

Refer a Friend
A Time to be Thankful - To God

Thanksgiving is uniquely American. There are of course regional twists to the holiday. Ours consists of fried turkey, cornbread dressing, sweet potato crunch and my favorite - sweet potato pie. It is a time for families to gather together in prayer around the table. As you join with family and friends, take time and reflect on that first Thanksgiving. William Bradford, Governor of Plymouth, proclaimed the first official day of Thanksgiving in October of 1621. What were they thankful for? One year after arriving, the Pilgrims stood at about half their original number. Not quite one year earlier they had arrived in New England from Holland after a 66-day journey across the North Atlantic. During that first winter 47 of the 102 Pilgrims were lost to disease and starvation. If it hadn't been for Squanto, the young Patuxent Indian, the second winter might have claimed them all. Squanto had been taken captive by slave traders, but monks in Spain purchased his freedom and taught him the Christian faith. He made his way to England, learned our language, and thence returned to America. He was there to welcome the Pilgrims shortly after their arrival. Squanto taught them how to plant corn in New England's rocky soil. He shared his special knowledge of forests and rivers. Governor Bradford said Squanto had been sent by God to be the little band's Joseph.

We trace not only our Christian heritage to this brave band of Pilgrims, but also our country's solid foundation of self-government. The Mayflower Compact was signed even before the Pilgrims landed. It laid out the ideals of government by consent of the governed and made clear their purpose, "undertaken for the Glory of God, and Advancement of the Christian Faith." Plymouth Rock is the place where those Pilgrims first set foot on America's shores. The great French political scientist Alexis de Tocqueville wrote about this scene. In his classic 1835 book, Democracy in America:

This rock has become an object of veneration in the United States...Does this not show very clearly that the power and greatness of man is wholly in his soul? Here is the stone that the feet of some miserable persons touched for an instant, and this stone becomes celebrated; it attracts the regard of a great people; they venerate its remnants; they parcel out its dust in the distance. What has become of the thresholds of so many palaces? Who cares about them?

Tocqueville was one of the first Europeans to recognize the change that was taking place "in the course of human events" in America. He wrote that religious freedom was the key to understanding democracy in America. Today, there are those who think that religion and democracy are at odds with one another. Tocqueville knew that a firm foundation of faith was essential to the rise of democracy.

Family Research Council is dedicated to the defense of faith, family and freedom. Today, more than ever, that cause is grounded on the solid rock of God's grace. One final note as your family assembles on this Thanksgiving Day. Literally tens of thousands of Americans are serving our country in the U.S. military who will not be with their families. They are fighting for freedom or standing watch over our liberties. Their thanksgiving dinner may be eaten in a tent, in a tank, on board an aircraft carrier, or even in a military hospital. Let's be sure to thank God for them, especially, on this day.

LAWYERS IN CONGRESS

The Senate is 60% lawyers and has been for many years. It is no accident that the Trial Lawyers Association has warned Obama not to allow any changes in Tort Law. The need for changes in Tort Law has been discussed for many years, but nothing ever gets done and there will be no action as long as the Senate is 60% lawyers. A supermajority is 60% and can block any legislation that the lawyers want blocked. The Senate is 60% lawyers, the House is 38% lawyers and rising. The Executive branch is 100% lawyers now. Obama and the V.P. are both lawyers. Of course the Supreme Court is 100% lawyers. Therefore the lawyer culture, ( sue them till they give in) controls all three branches of government now. The bureaucracy is loaded with lawyers. Data shows that there is a lawyer for every 14 residents of Washington DC. They know where the power and money is located. We do not have government by legislation, we have government by litigation. The state of California and many other states cannot have a law passed by the electorate without having it turned upside down by the courts. Law schools produce more lawyers each year than there are those that are needed. Failed lawyers in private practice all go the Washington DC to live. The lawyer culture acts as if they deserve to have power and money, just because they are law school graduates. We need to stop electing lawyers to public office.

ROSE PARK-THE GHOST BRIGADE OF KALAMAZOO

ROSE PARK
THE GHOST BATTALION OF KALAMAZOO

The day was cloudy, damp and somber as if all nature knew that it should not intrude on the memories of the people searching the bricks. Many of the bricks had a star each side of the soldier’s’ name, telling that he had been killed in action. The sounds at Rose Park were of people slowly searching the bricks, looking for a particular name. The crowd stirred as the uniformed color guard brought the Stars and Stripes to Rose Park for the memorial ceremony to begin. A cannon roared twice and then the names of eleven hundred Kalamazoo men who gave their lives in defense of the nation were being read aloud so that we, the living, would know the price of liberty and freedom. These veterans who should not be forgotten and who knew that there are American Ideals worth dying for.
Elderly veterans read the names of the men killed in action in all the wars from the Civil to the most recent conflict. A uniformed veteran braced to attention as the names were being read and saluted as a particular name was pronounced. I believe the veteran knew the man and the sacrifice that was made so long ago. Some of the men quietly wiped their eyes, hoping that people would not notice. My uncle, standing next to me, dropped his head a bit when the name Jack Kean was read. I know the history. A day in 1942 when a Japanese machine gun, hidden in the tall kunai grass chattered, chattered again and still again and cut Jack in half. Sixty years later, my uncle still has dreams of the battles.
The street traffic sounds intruded on the solemnity of the occasion so I closed my eyes to concentrate on the names being read. After a time I noticed a cadence to the traffic sounds that began to take on the rhythm of the reading of the names. I kept my eyes closed and the cadence became the marching sounds of the Ghost Battalion of Kalamazoo. Men in Union Blue, WWI Brown, WWII Khaki, shivering from Korean cold, wet from Vietnam sweat, row on row marching past Rose Park. As each line passed, their heads snapped to the right and their eyes, wet with tears, pierced our souls to see if we really understood why they had sacrificed their lives and if we are willing to protect their gift of Liberty and Freedom

OLDERWISER

LIBERAL RAGE AND SELF HATE

LIBERAL RAGE AND SELF-HATE

All of us, at one time or another in our lives, secretly fear that a person that we have met is trying to do us some harm. Often, people try to hide that suspicion because if the fear is known, they realize that others will take that fear as evidence that there really is something to hide. That is, we fear we are not quite “normal” because others do not see the situation the same as we see it. If two people see the same situation differently, one of them must be making an error in the interpretation. Similarly, most people assume that their reaction is “normal” and that other people would react to a given situation in the same manner. This of course , is not true, but some of us cannot admit to the possibility that the one who is making an error in judgment is ourselves. The famous saying by Walt Kelly “We have met the enemy and they are us” is a succinct way of saying the same thing. Anyone who really does have something to hide, is particularly prone to the problem. Such a person does not like themselves because they have something to hide and must live forever with the fear that they will be discovered. There are two ways that we deal with this fear. One it to retreat into ourselves and meld into the background, keeping ourselves out of sight. The other is to attack, attack, attack and
hope to frighten others so they will not dare to look to see that we are hiding something. The very fact that the attacks are unreasonable is evidence that the attacker really does have something to hide. The really sad part of all this is that the attacker cannot forgive themselves for whatever it is that they are hiding. The famous book “I’m OK ,You’re OK” gives another way of dealing with the fear.

Liberals who attack, attack, attack are advertising the fact that they believe they are not quite normal. Most are miserable people who try to make sure that all others are going to be as miserable as they feel. They may have a superior education but suspect that they may not be as intelligent as they want others to believe. In their own mind, they have not succeeded as well as they think they should be capable of doing. “Those other people must be too stupid to see my superior qualities“. Many highly educated people have this problem. Sad to say, they don’t realize that the problem is really no problem at all They are unable to accept themselves as they really are. That is a sad, sad way to have to live a life. .
The Liberals accuse conservatives of having "an anger management problem." This is a classic example of Liberals projecting their own feelings onto someone else.

Quoting Michelle Malkin in Townhall:
“Like CNN executive Jonathan Klein, who derided Fox's audience as full of ‘angry white men, and those men tend to be rabid,’ and liberal comedian Bill Maher, who also railed that ‘Republicans need anger management‘ and are possessed with a ‘vein-popping, gut-churning rage that consumes the entire right wing,’ Ms. Garofalo crossly blames the Right while denying the pathological wrath and fury that characterize the unhinged Left.”
“Who are you calling angry, Ms. Garofalo? You want political road rage? Let's start with Al. Take your pick: Sharpton. Gore. Franken.” Now, open your eyes: It isn't out-of-control conservatives …. smearing pig's blood and feces on the walls and windows of military recruitment centers across the country to protest on behalf of peace.
It isn't rage-blinded conservative professors who embrace fragging (the murder of American soldiers by their fellow soldiers on the battlefield) as a legitimate anti-war tactic.
It isn't vengeful conservatives torching SUVs, condo developments, and research facilities, and targeting biotech and pharmaceutical company employees and their families to protest on behalf of the environment.
It wasn't mad conservatives sporting "F--- Bush" license plates, punching cardboard cutouts of the president, and vowing to secede after losing the 2004 presidential election.
It wasn't rabid conservatives who gloated over Ronald Reagan's death or John Ashcroft's pancreatitis.
It wasn't a gut-busting conservative journalist who vowed to kill herself if Dick Cheney ran for president. (That would be the perpetually aggrieved Helen Thomas.)
It wasn't hate-filled Republican officials who reportedly screamed "faggot" and "fruitcake" and "I'll break your nose" at their political opponents. (Those were all Democrats: Pennsylvania state legislator Vincent Fumo, California Rep. Pete Stark, and Virginia Rep. Jim Moran, respectively.)
It isn't fanatical conservatives joking about the assassination of President Bush and the execution of his Republican aides. (That, Ms. Garofalo, would include your Air America colleagues. But I'll forgive you if you weren't tuned in to them. Few are.)
And it wasn't ruthless conservatives who cheered last week when a liberal Bush-hater wrote on the popular DemocraticUnderground.com website last week:
I am an American, Born and Raised, but I am NOT a citizen of BUSH'S America. I want nothing to do with the country these people have created.
And for those who support them, Let's get Something Nice And Sparkling CLEAR:
Stay The [F---] Away From Me. Stay OUT of my personal space. I want NOTHING from you. I want NOTHING to do with you. I want NOTHING to do with your "vision" of what the world should be.
What DO I want from you?
Honestly?
I will freely admit there are days, and they are becoming more than not, that the Alien at Area 51 in Independence Day and I share quite a common ground on the answer to that question.
And I am NOT apologizing for it.
In the words of the Late, Great Bill Hicks, about the most conciliatory thing I can say for those people at this point is simply this:
Kill Yourself’ “
The Liberals are unable to live up to their own expectations and are trying to make sure the rest of us are just as miserable as they are.

OLDERWISER

THE KALAMAZOO STUTTERS COUNCIL

The Kalamazoo Stutters Council
January 12, 2009
Subject: The Kalamazoo Stutterers Council
This is a true story. I was there when it happened.
I am a stutterer and there was a time in my life when I had trouble saying my own name. The Gazette’s recent articles on stuttering brought to mind one of the efforts by Kalamazoo stutterers to help the students in the Van Riper Speech Pathology Department. The students were not stutterers, they were only learning how to help stutterers deal with their problem. A WMU student who stuttered, [not in Speech Pathology] had the idea of making an organization of stutterers available to the students so that their speech pathology training could be more realistic by working with real stutterers. The effort was made in the late 1970’s to organize the Kalamazoo Stutterers Council. A notice was published to invite those who stuttered to meet at a home on Knollwood St. to organize the Kalamazoo Stutterers Council. The organization meeting was held in a large front room with about 25 or 30 stutterers on chairs placed along the walls of the room. The meeting began by attempting to state the purpose of the Kalamazoo Stutterers Council. When a person who stutters is in a group of stutterers, the problem becomes much worse because self-consciousness takes over and stuttering increases immensely. After less than hour, the organization effort failed while the stuttering became much worse. The meeting did not achieve its goals. It was the last time the Kalamazoo Stutterers Council ever met. It’s important to have a sense of humor.

There Are Two Kinds of Unions

TWO KINDS OF UNIONS

There are two kinds of unions. A union works for a private company that is
owned by a private person. The owner and the union representative proceed to
negotiate. The union and the owner agree on the employee’s salaries and
other compensation, and a contract is signed. The owner is able
(because he is at the bargaining table) to control how much of the companies’
profit he is able to share with the employees and still have enough left to maintain
his business. If the owner continues to give so much of the company’s revenue that
his business cannot pay its bills, the company fails and there is no company, no profit and
no jobs for the employees. The owner may decide to move the business to a place where his decisions and agreements with the employees’ union do not endanger the company, the employee’s jobs or the
ability to make a profit and stay in business. The owner has the right and the power to make these decisions
because he owns the business.
The second type of union is where both sides do not have any need to worry about
profits or the future health of the company. An example of the second type of union is
the SCME (State,County,Municipal Employee) union. Both parties, the union and state
representative decide how much the tax payers are going to have to pay to keep
government functioning and also how much the government employees are going
to be paid. However, there is no one at the negotiation table that represents the tax payers.
The first statement from many readers, union members and politicians is going to be
that the politician is the tax payers’ representative. There is no consequence
for the politician or the union if the employee’s salaries and benefits are much
more than the taxpayer is willing or can afford to pay for the jobs in question.
The result is that the cost of government at all levels (including the Federal) keeps
going up and we wonder why we, the tax payers, are struggling to pay our bills
and are paid so much less than the bureaucracy.
There is a video clip on the internet showing the head of the National Education
Association union saying to the union members that the purpose of the union is
not education, it is the power to elect politicians who will take the union’s dues
money and vote in Congress the way the union wants him to. The power of the
union is based on the union member’s dues money that is kicked back from
the union to the politician in return for the special interest legislation that the
union wants. The tax payer has no seat at the table and no chance to say how
much or where his taxes are spent in support of unions and union leaders.
The fight in Wisconsin over the size and cost of government employees is exactly
the result of the taxpayer not having a seat at the negotiation table and the greed
of both the politician and the union. The tax payer is at the mercy of the politician
who believes his job is more important than good government. The government
employees know that their bloated salaries are the direct result of using tax money
to pay politicians to pass legislation to keep the power of the union intact.
Some one who has access to the Excel spread sheet that is used by the Wisconsin
school teacher’s union (National Education Association union) has posted the
salaries of teachers, staff, bus drivers and garbage municipal garbage haulers for all to
see. The garbage men make between $70,000 and $159,000 per year plus benefits!
There will be some who question the accuracy of the Wisconsin data, but the fact
remains that the cost of state government in Wisconsin (and Michigan) is set by
politicians and unions, without the presence of the tax paying public at the
negotiating table.
Wisconsin’s governor is trying to do something about the greed and power of
unions and politicians. It is clear who in government is pleasing the
special interests when the all the Wisconsin democrats left the state and refuse to
do the job they were elected to do. We need to get the Michigan data that tells
us the government employee’s wages. How much of the wages and union dues
end up in the election campaigns of politicians?
The taxpayers need to have at least one representative at the bargaining table to
be sure that the contract does not have salaries and benefits that are too high for
the job in question and that the employee’s compensation is adequate but is
not so high that the union is able to kick back union dues to the politician’s election
campaign. A union is for the benefit of the employee’s salary and benefits,
not for the union to influence who gets elected. Any politician who takes union
money should not be elected.